Jerry; It seems, you always had the luck? Correct?
Robert; Why yes, of course. But don't forget, I may-
Jerry; Forget what? Maybe, I should've checked.
Robert; But why? It's not that I-. I couldn't betray-
Jerry; Your dearest friend? Such hate of course, not that.
Robert; Been busy lately? Money, buisness-wise?
Jerry; The usual. I'm finding...a small flat.
Robert; Superb! For Emma then? Her little surprise?
Jerry; Indeed. Our paradise on Earth, for us.
Robert; Your heaven. Joy from me to you my friend.
Jerry; So equally felt, no distrust or fuss.
Robert; But knowing Emma, does she not intend..
Jerry; I assure you, intentions made, are true.
Robert; Good. To today, when worthless lives persue!
I think I take a look at the other side of Betrayel. ^^
ReplyDeleteNot deep inside it, but the words that show spite and anger.
I hope that meaning gets through. :)
*betrayal. ;D
ReplyDeletePentameters: YES (apart from Lines 3, 4, 7 & 8) .
ReplyDeleteAnd which of your pentameters are iambic? Almost ALL of them (apart from lines 11 and 13).
As for the poem itself, I am particularly impressed by how you are making it sound like a genuine conversation (with each interrupting the other's lines). Very effective. And the spite and anger are palpable: well done!