(two old ladies are sitting at the bus stop waiting for a bus to come)

June: Bloody weather, everyday its flippin raining, couldn't it have a break
Beth: It ain't that bad love, good god you do like to complain a little bit don't ya,
June : Ohh, just shut up would ya, you know i'm right so keep your comments hush.
Beth: Okay then darling, don't you worry, I'll keep my mouth shut.
(Pause)
June: How longs this bus gonna be then ?
Beth: Flippin hell darling make your mind up, do you want me to be quiet or not then, hey?
June: Ohhh Just shut up okay?
Beth : Thank You
(Pause)
June : Those kids are such a riot init Beth.
Beth : Quor, yes love , oh you know Joanne from down the club, she nearly got runover by one of the cycles the other day, scared the life out of her, nearly had to take her to hospital. Nearly had a heartattack.
June : Oh dear, how is she?
Beth : Oh she's fine now love don't you worry about her.
June : So where you heading to?
Beth : Oh just of shopping for my tea, planning on having sausage 'n' mash, avn't had it in ages, got a real feel for it today.
June: Yum, sounds lovely, havin it with your husband, whats his name.......Oh yeah Jim, how is he love still recovering from the stroke
Beth : Yes love, he's doin fine, miss having the old jim though. but we're doing ok. (a tear rolls down her eye)
June: Oh thank god, here comes my bus .
Beth:Oh dear, urmm, I think I'll walk now love, sorry dear.
June: Oh it's ok, I'll see you monday yeah, we'll have a nice gossip.
Beth: Yeah that'll be great, Bye
June: OK dear, look after yourself, Bye

(He's nervously shaking as he sits in the middle of his jail cell)
My life wasn't meant to be destined to end in jail, I wanted to do things big, travel the world. If it wasn't for drink and drugs i wouldn't be getting ready to die. Those guards aren't excactly respectful, won't even let me pray for forgiveness before i go to the chair. I ain't scared of dying though. Just scared i go the wrong way, that's why i'm wanting to pray.
Even if they do keep it quiet out there, god probably won't listen anyway's i've done too much for any forgiveness, I mean seven murders, nine rapes and assaults on over twenty girls. And i do regret everysingle one of them, well i didnt at the time. I didn't even remember doing them . Yet the judge didnt believe me when i told him that. Still sentenced me to death.
Still think i deserve it though, I mean what type of bastard would kill a nine year old girl, and let the family suffer like that, three years they never knew, i knew, It burnt in my mind every single day, destroying someone else's life. Destroying my life.
(He start's rocking on the floor and crying as he speaks)
I'm sorry, So very sorry, Destroyed lives. Hurt people. Am sooo very sorry.
(Hides his head in his arms)
God, God, God please, please, please forgive me, i'm sorry, bless me when i die , allow me to join you up in heaven.
(Someone knocks on the cell door, He straightens himself up and wipes the tears from his face)
Five minutes, five minutes till i take the walk, am goin to be gone in twenty minutes. But i have to go with pride. Walk down there, not too proud as if i'm glad of what i've done but to go and not embarass the ones out there who love me. My wife, my children, my life It's all going to be gone...
(another knock on the door , he stands up and stops at the door)
Please god, forgive me and love me. I'm sorry.

A Red-blooded repeat...

Little Red: I'm off now mother, you know, to give these goodies to grandma. Won't be long!
Mother: Hold on a second now Red. We don't want a repeat of last time now do we. Now you're certain you're prepared and know what to do, yes?
Little Red: Yes mother. We've gone over it a million times now. (mimics mother) Don't talk to strangers, don't pick strawberries, and never trust any absurd species like foxes to direct you when in need of help... (mutters) again.
Mother: Well done. And make sure you keep that cake well wrapped up. We don't want it getting stuck to the biscuits now do we. What an awful mess that would make!
Little Red: We've gone over this so many times mother. How comes it's always grandma that's getting ill? I understand she’s getting old and all but still…
Mother: Can you blame that sweet lady? That bloody wolf nearly gave her a bleeding heart attack the last time this all happened. Speaking of wolf remember not to...
Little Red: MOTHER!
Mother: Very well. Now stop all this chit chat. Grandma will be expecting you soon!
Little Red: Goodbye mother... I’ll be home as soon as I can! (She walks out of the front door singing)
Little Red: Oh my! An apple tree! Mother said not to pick any STRAWBERRIES. Apples should be fine (smiling to herself). Maybe grandma could use these for those lovely apple pies she makes (she bends down to pick up fallen apples from the ground when a rather familiar figure taps her from behind)
Wolf: Hello there Red. Look I understand that we've had our ups and downs and all but this time I sincerely am sorry for everything that’s happened between us. (Smiling) Friends?
Little red: Err... Yeah. Whatever… I guess. I must dash!
Wolf: Visiting grandma again are we Red?
Little red: I really must go...
Wolf: Hey, those apples look mighty heavy! Why don’t you let me take those little burdens off your hand and let me carry them for you?
Little red: (thinks) well, I guess so if that’s all you want... this time.
Wolf: (grins showing his baring pointy gleaming white teeth, he mutters to himself) works every time...

Mini Play

Two women are sitting in a café with chicken and pesto sandwiches and coffees.

 

Tiff-  Did you know next year Harriet is going to be offered a trip to the Seychelles. It’s a special treat they do for the high performing scholars.

Jo- Scholars?

Tiff- It’s what they call the pupils, it makes a difference in morale, even if it is mere tokenism.

Jo- Do they have an educational psychologist or something? [Laughs]

Tiff- yes, more like a bespoke counsellor, in fact Harriet has little hour long discussion sessions with her every fortnight, they talk about death, life and philosophy. It has really changed Harry’s perspective on life.

Jo- I think that’s therapy, Tiff.

Tiff- Oh Christ of course not [starts to blush with realisation] you have grabbed the wrong end of the stick my dear. [Pause]

Jo- Ellie’s doing her Guajarati GCSE early.

Tiff- Is that a religion?

Jo- No it’s a language from India.

Tiff- I thought they spoke Arabic in India.

Jo- She took an interest, when she started hanging out with Gupreet, her boyfriend’s sister.

Tiff- Oh she has a boyfriend, finally something interesting. Go on.

Jo- [she half sighs] yes, he is called Jay and he is in his first year at medical school in Mile End. He is lovely looking, and he and Ellie met when he was doing a DJ set at Fabric.

Tiff- So they fell in love over electronic beats and barbaric baselines, sounds exhilarating to say the least.

Jo- You know how hard you had to work to get that third in environmental studies, which you now use for control over the Recycling division of the women’s institute Dorking. The reason you got that third, Sharon Tiffany Jones…

Tiff- I have been called Tiff for twenty ff…

Jo- The reason you got that third, Sharon is because I spent three years making sure you wore clean knickers, taking spliffs out of your mouth to ensure that my best friend would get at least a third in Environmental studies at Middlesex Polytechnic.

Tiff-it’s Middlesex university now.

Task 23: An exemplar

Wolf 1 is sitting in an armchair by the fire, talking on the phone to Wolf 2. His conversation is interrupted by loud banging at his door, which continues intermittently throughout the scene.

Wolf 1: (Shouts) I'm on the phone!!! (Normal volume again) Sorry, it's those bloody pigs again. Honestly, it's the last time I give building advice to a piece of pork!
Wolf 2: I know what you mean. But it's not the animals I'm fed up with. It's pests of the human variety. It's enough to make me stop volunteering for meals on wheels.
Wolf 1: Now don't be silly. You know how much the old dear appreciates it.
Wolf 2: The old dear is fine; the old dear is a dream - always charm personified. But her granddaughter...
Wolf 1: She been round again, has she?
Wolf 2: Too bloody right she has. Her and Mr "Look how big my axe is!" Almost enough to make me wish I wasn't a vegan.
Wolf 1: Have you tried reasoning with them?
Wolf 2: Reasoning? With a teenage girl? You've got to be joking. I'd rather deal with your little pink friends any day.
Wolf 1: You say that, but you don't know the half of it. Got a solicitor's letter this morning. The fat one is suing me. Can you believe it? Says it's my fault his house fell down. Apparently it was nothing to do with that storm the other night.
Wolf 2: I know: awful, wasn't it! I thought it was never going to stop.
Wolf 1: Me too. But he's saying it was me. Reckons I 'blew' his house down.
Wolf 2: The cheek! If he'd only listened to you in the first place. You were only trying to save his bacon!
Wolf 1: Nice one. (He chuckles) You going tonight? WA meeting?
Wolf 2: Wouldn't miss one, you know me. I'm on the tenth step now.
Wolf 1: Pick me up on the way, would you? I really don't want to go through the forest at night. The three bears called earlier. They reckon that little, blond hooligan is out on the rampage again.
Wolf 2: Course. See you at eight. What's the time now?
Wolf 1: Dinner time.
Wolf 2: Thought so. See you later. (Hangs up)
Wolf 1: (Shouts again) Yes, yes - I'm coming. (Mutters) Bloody pigs...

Task 23: Subverted Archetypes

This week's task is very similar to Task 22 in many ways:

• a short, self-contained, pithy piece of drama (i.e. a 'tiny play')
• only two characters
• a convincing, believable, engaging dialogue
• a powerful, effective, satisfying ending
• subtle treatment of deeper themes beneath comical/banal surface

So revisit the Task 22 exemplars (together with chex's and teletubbiez's attempts at Task 22, together with jaffacake's 2nd attempt and giggles' first one) for a clue as to how to go about this.

The difference this time around, is that your two characters should be lifted from a fairy tale (or a combination of tales) - or a traditional story like that. However, your fairy tale archetypes will need to behave in an atypical way, probably exemplified largely by the way you conclude your play.

Please look at the moderators' comments from Task 22 too - and not only for YOUR attempt, but for everyone else's too - as they will enable you to make your Task 23 especially strong.

My exemplar will follow shortly. Your deadline is midnight on Saturday 12th April (a week extra for this one!).

Good luck!

Fish and Chips

John: Ahh now that's what I like to see. A delightful plate of traditional British fish and chips served with a nice pint of beer. Top nosh!
Joanne: You make me sick... If only you knew the truth, the truth of how those poor little innocent fish live their lives.
John:The only stage of their life that interests me is when they're lying on my plate surrounded by crispy golden batter, smothered in vinegar and coated in Heinz ketchup.
Joanne: (laughing) Whats next...? (impersonates m&s advert) This is not just fish, this is M&S fish.
(Both start laughing. John begins to tuck in and lets out a satisfied groan)
Joanne: First they take the inculpable illiterate infant away from its mother and put it in an isolated facility.
John: Nice try but i bet you a million pounds that you could never ever put me off my grub. Oh and I prefer the young, as the adults tend to have codworm.
Joanne: Afterwards they continuously force-feed the helpless fish, fattening and plumping it up ready for serving.
John: Well who pays for a fish that's purely skin and bone. Now I know why you sympathise with it. Look at you: you're wasting away.
Joanne: Finally they will kill the fish by a fast, heavy blow to the head and/or spiking (using a narrow-bladed knife to penetrate and then destroy the brain).
(John pauses eating, still with mouthful of fish in his gob. Looks at Joanne. Smiles...and continues eating.)
John: Like I said, nothing you can say can put me off my food.
Joanne: Oh, I forgot to tell you. Seeing as Smelly, our adorable little puppy, is being toilet trained, I haven't had time to get a potty so i used the vinegar pot. I was going to throw it away but seeing as you like your fish soaked in it I might as well not buy one now.
(John spits out his fish and runs towards the bathroom. Joanne laughs)
Joanne: Please make all cheques payable to Joanne Thomas...

Task 22

(A young couple lying on a field on a summers night)

Girl: What do you think they are, all them stars out there? (Looks to the sky with a wondering gaze)
Boy: (smiles) Well, scientists have proved that they're distant planets, and other suns, and that... (pauses) but I like to think they're wishes.
Girl: (Looks at him with suspicion in her eyes) Wishes?
Boy: Yes, wishes.. (closes his eyes, apparently satisfied with his answer)
Girl: You mean, you think, like, if I wished for something, it would turn into a star? (she asks mockingly, sitting up to look at him)
Boy: Yes, and when there's no hope of wishes ever coming true, they fall to earth and crash, or simply burn out, I guess.. Just a theory.. (He begins to blush realising how fantastic it all sounds)
Girl: (smiles down at him) You're weird, but I wouldnt have it any other way
(She bends down to kiss him and they lay on their backs, side by side)
(Long pause)
Girl: So, what do you wish for?
Boy: (Long pause before answering) Mostly, I wish.. Ah it's stupid.
Girl: Ah come on! Tell me
Boy: Mostly I wish for us to last forever (He says really fast, turning red again)
(He steals a glance at her, catches her eye and looks away)
Girl: (Smiles to herself)
(There's a silence)
Girl: Oh shoot! I have to go home! Look how late it is! Oh no, my parents are gonna freak! (She scrambles to her feet) I, I have to go-
Boy: When will I see you again ( He sits up)
Girl: Um, I, Ah I dunno (She starts to walk away) I'll let you know, I really have to go, you know what they're like.. I'll call you, maybe.

(Before he can get to his feet, she's running down the hill, and then out of sight.
And it's as if all the stars had burned out in his heart that night...)

Task 22

Two Elderly women sitting in a hotel reception

Pat: Ohhh, just look at the state of that one Marge! I wonder how much she got payed to drop em.
Marge:Cor blimey! I thought this were meant to be the Hilton! Not some pick up Motel!
Pat: Tell me about it. Mind you, they use more fancy names for Prossie's nowadays, escorts o summin' like that.
Marge: Well, there ae new names for eveything nowadays love! Ahh, when is this bloody boy going to hury up eh? Its getting on.
Pat: He'll be down soon, that receptionist left a message for us. Tel ya what, Im gonna help meself to one of these mints while I wait, they look bloody expensive!
Marge: Ahh, I think I'll do the same Pat. Infact, I'll sneak a few into me purs for the journey home. Although, they don't make mints like they used to.
Pat: You would think they'd have some sort of newspaper or magazine to keep us uccopyed while waiting wouldn't ya? Honestly, the service is slacking.
Marge: Cor blimey yeah! I mean, I'm a 64 year old woman, I can't just yank one of them playstation things out me bleedin' pocket and play it! Its ridiculous!
Pat: Well, you could aways complain about it. Ya know, demanding a Gadeners choice or evening standard.
Marge: Oh no, I could never complain, never do that.
Pat: No?
Marge: Well once they see an elderly woman handing in a letter of complaint, they'd chuck it right away wouldn't they?! Don't be daft! Complain? These people don't care about complaints from a pesioner like me. Nagger,Whinger; thats what they'd call me.
Pat: Ah maybe, still, always worth a try aint it?
Marge: Oh! Here's the fella! About Bleeding time to! Here Fella, I was just saying how bloody bad the service is here......

Task 19

I feel like your words have ripped out my heart,
You've destroyed every happy thought I had,
It feels like I'm going to fall apart,,
How could you make me feel so very sad,
How you treated me made me want to cry,
I feel you've chopped up all of my inside,
You left me on my own with no goodbye,
You hurt me so much I felt like I died,
So I think you owe me so much heartbreak,
You think you would get away with it all,
You're not the only one who can act fake,
I can destroy you I can make you fall,
The hate for you has masked my depression,
You've caused this my secret obsession.

The least suspected: Prudence & Patience

Two sisters attend a funeral – they talk privately about the deceased

Prudence: So [pause] what do we do now?

Patience: nothing

Prudence: what do you mean “nothing”; we can’t just leave things as they are

Patience: Why not? Alice always told us to leave well enough alone right? [Pause]

Prudence: I’m not sure, I mean, do you think we did the right thing?

Patience: You’re not having second thoughts are you? [pause] Listen, we did what we had to; think of it as survival of the fittest - It was either her or us

Prudence: but …

Patience: but what?

Prudence: she was our…our sister [pause]

Patience: that doesn’t make what she did any less malicious

Prudence: but that didn’t give us the right to do this - She made a mistake!

Patience: Yeah, a mistake that cost her her life

Prudence: Are you really going to be able to live with yourself?

Patience: I clearly recall that you were a willing participant at the time, why the sudden change of heart

Prudence: Alice didn’t deserve this, it was a mistake… she made a mistake [pause] and so did we

Patience: All we can do now is face the facts and move on

Prudence: Move on! We killed our sister and you want me to “face the facts and move on”! [Pause] Who are you?

Patience: [sigh] where do we go from here then - what do we do now? [Pause]

Prudence: Nothing

Hating to love...

Sahara: WHY?!
Kashan: 'Cos you get on my bloody last nerve!
Sahara: You just never will leave me in peace will ya? Always doin' something to annoy me... going out of your way to make ME look like the damn fool... To think that I l-
Kashan: What?
Sahara: Nothing, nothing. Forget it.
Kashan: You didn't finish... To think that you what?
(Silence)
Kashan: TO THINK THAT YOU WHAT? TALK TO ME SAHARA!
Sahara: To think that I loved you, you bastard!
Kashan: I don't understand...
Sahara: Oh how unpredictable. You don't get most things you pathetic, ignorant, unaware excuse for a man!
Kashan: Technically, i'm still referred to as a teenager.
Sahara: Give it a rest will ya. All you do is make my life hell. You won't leave me alone... Kinda like bullying me I guess.. I mean why? You hated me from the start... telling all my friends that you hated me... telling YOUR friends that you hated me... I never quite got it with you, you know that?
Kashan: Most people don't.
Sahara: Do you really hate me that much? I mean it's like you take the piss out of me whenever you get the chance. And even when there isn't you still manage to find a way. I think for you the biggest embarassment of your life was knowing me. Am I right?
Kashan: No
Sahara: HA. Sure. Was it something i did wrong? Did I offend you or anythin'?
Kashan: No.
Sahara: Why the silence now?
Kashan: I never knew you felt that way.
Sahara: What way?
Kashan: Loving me.
Sahara: Well... that was a long time ago anyways... I guess.
Kashan: What about now?
Sahara: What?
Kashan: Simple question. Yes or no. Sahara... DO YOU SILL LOVE ME?
Sahara: Kashan...
Kashan: DO YOU?
Sahara: I can't answer that. Why?
Kashan: Just wondering...
Sahara: Look... I think it's best we just TRY and get along atleast... you know what I'm sayin'? Like just to get through the school days without bein sworn enemies... if that's okay with you?
Kashan: No
Sahara: Sorry? What? Why?
Kashan: 'Cos I love you Sahara

Ambitions

(Tom travels on his Daily routine to work on the tube with his girl friend arm in arm.)

Tom: Don't you ever get bored of life.

Shelly: Why would I?

Tom: Don't you ever feel like getting out of it... changing it?

Shelly: Never really thought of it so deeply, why?

Tom: I'm getting tired of life. I wanna do something which stands out...

Shelly: Ryt.....

Tom: I wanna die leaving a mark on this world... something I'd be remembered by, something which makes my life worth while.

Shelly: And how you propose to do that?...

Tom: I wanna life which leaves memories even after I'm gone

Shelly:...?

Tom: Life's short... and we're going to slow... we need to speed ourselves up a bit and catch up with the rest of the world... and maybe take the lead?

Shelly: Where are you trying to go with this speech?

Tom: Shelly, shut up.... and marry me.

(Shelly backs away, doors open)

Operator: 'This is the last stop'.

Shelly: Too fast Tom... too fast. Sorry.

(Shelly walks of tube leaving Tom to wonder on his own in the now empty tube.)

agriculture revisited

(Two middle-aged country farmers sit at a bar in the local country pub.)

Jim: tell you what this beats shovellin horse shit any day.

Fred: you can say that again.

Jim: how are your horses by the way?

Fred: oh you know the norm.

Jim: still trying to mount you every time you enter the stable?

Fred: ‘fraid so.

Jim: that’s a first. Gay horses.

Fred: not the only gay creature on my farm I tell yer,

Jim: please I’d rather not know.

Fred: well if one day you come to visit me, keep your eye out.

Jim: I will.

Fred: o yes did I tell you about my new combine harvester?

Jim: since when have you had that?

Fred: since Mr. Briggs died.

Jim: really?

Fred: yes.

Jim: that close was you?

Fred: I suppose so, yes.

Jim: oh well, I must be going.

Fred: hang on you’ve not even finished your drink yet!

Jim: I can barely stand now!

Fred: if you must then…

Jim: cheerio! Oh and by the way. Good luck with those horses.

task 22

Two best friends talking. One friend has just dumped her boyfriend.

Tania- how can he do that to me? Who does he fink he is?
Nisha- I told you from the beginning his not worth it, don’t waste your tears on him, would he ever cry over you?
Tania- but you don’t understand, I thought, I thought he was different. I thought he loved me.
Nisha- Don’t think about him, you should feel gratis; you should feel fortunate not to be fixed with that temperamental bastard. Think about all he put you through.
Tania- yeah but I love him...
Nisha-love what? His mood swings... 1 day his nice to you the next his fucked... Don’t bother with him.
Tania- but Nish, you don’t know my hopes my plans; I thought we was going to get married.
Nisha- married? At 16, Tania seriously love, stop hurting yourself you know never to think ahead. That’s the problem with you.
Tania- I can’t help it, he just he just was perfect, everything I ever wanted was in him. The ideal smile, the awesome personality. I really need to get over him.
Nisha- you really need to stop thinking about the past and concentrate on now. Forget him. His not worth it. No ones worth your tears. Just think of it as his lost out, because he has.
Tania- I really hope I get over him.

Task 22- A Sissy's Guide Book...

Jason: (Says to a girl walking down the road)'Ello Sexy
Reece: You really should learn how to speak to girls.
Jason: What do you mean? I speak to girls all the time, I did just then.
Reece: No, you know what I mean. Have some respect for them.
Jason: Err. Why would I do that?
Reece: Because, it's MANNERS.
Jason: (Confused) Since when did you care about manners?
Reece: Since now. I mean, you wouldn't like your mother being spoken to like that would you?
Jason: Hmm. Nah but that's my mum. My mum ain't like these girls I talk to.
Reece: What's the difference?
Jason: My mum is OLD.
Reece: You've got some issues.
Jason: Fine then. (Says to another girl) Hello Beautiful.
(Girl Smiles)
Reece: See (He smiles proudly)
Jason: (Kisses his teeth) Whatever man. What's that, 'A Sissy's Guide Book to Getting A Girl To Smile At You'?
Reece: Yeah. (He giggles)

Task 22

Two men are sweeping the floor of a barber shop, there’s a woman over at the corner shop who happens to be the Barber’s wife.

Eric What on earth do you think you’re doing?
David Just checking out that fit bird over at the corner shop.
Eric You nasty, dirty pervert….. Let me have a look.
David HAHA you can’t resist can ya?
Eric Well, I’m just having a little peep, I mean what harm can that cause….
David Well mate, like I’ve always said…
(Eric Jumps Back in Surprise)
David DUDE!!! What are you doing?!!!
Eric Eh Dave, do you know who we’ve been staring at all this time?!
David Erm… Heather Mills? Fearne Briton?
Eric No Dave you bumbling buffoon!!! That’s Tim’s Wife!!!
David And...?
Eric Don’t you get it? We’ve been eyeing up Tim’s Wife, He’ll never want to talk to us again.
David Oh, So you think that Tim’s going to think that his Bird’s doing the dirty on him with us?
(Eric feebly Ruffles David’s short stocky hair with the ancient art of a SLAP)
Eric Well David if that’s how you wish to put it, yes.
(David massages the spot where Eric had slapped him whilst simultaneously speaking)
David Well it wouldn’t surprise me, I almost had her in high school, I don’t see why that should change now.
Eric Just shut up you “yob” of a man.
David Take a Chill Pill Dude, Tim won’t find out if we don’t tell him, besides we were only goggling her goodies.
Eric I know but I feel bad and…
David Listen you little schoolgirl, just calm down and shut up, Tim would never find out…
(Whilst David and Eric are talking they are blindly unaware that Tim is standing right behind them listening to they’re conversation)
Tim WHAT’S THIS ABOUT MY WIFE?!!!!!!!!
David Busted……

Task 22

(A couple sitting on a sofa facing away from each other, looking at a blank screen. The room is a bit dark and there is some light shinning from the window.)

Jay: Very interesting. Isn’t it?

Kate: Oh yes, I love watching a blank screen. It makes the television look…much nicer.

Jay: Well darling, it wasn’t exactly my fault. I’m missing my football, I wonder what the score is now.

Kate: Of course it wasn’t. It wasn't you who poured your glass of beer on the television. Now it's broken, so can we go out to dinner, then?

Jay: Hmm…no I think I want to stay here.

Kate: And do what? You can’t even watch football. It’s a good thing you can’t though because that is all you ever do.

Jay: And all you ever do is look at yourself in the mirror.

Kate: Looks like you love the blank screen more than me.

Jay: Wow, this is really interesting. Never thought looking at a blank screen would be so amazing.

Kate: Hmm...yes dear, so wonderful. Isn't it? Do you love me?

Jay: Yeah I love you.

Kate: Look at me and say it then.

Jay: Don’t you just love looking at this blank screen? I think it’s so much better than watching football.

Kate: Hmm…Yeah. But I thought football was your life. Guess it’s not anymore, is it?

Jay: You still want to go out to dinner?

Kate: Yes. (pause) Actually no, I don’t feel like eating.

Jay: Oh okay. We’ll just stay here.

Kate: I don’t feel like sitting here, on this sofa and watching a blank screen with you.

Jay: Do what you like, darling.

Kate: Alright. I’m going to bed. Are you coming?

Jay: Yeah, I’ll be there in a few minutes.

Kate: Suit yourself. Your football is not going to come on.

Jay: I know, darling. Watching the blank screen, makes me happy.

Kate: Oh…goodnight.

Task 22

Lisa: I can’t do this

Joanne: Yes you can! Just hold on to the sheet tightly!

Mark: I think its best you stop wiggling it might go in a bit easier

Joanne: I’m going to go now it might be a bit easier if people aren’t watching

Mark: Thanks Joanne

Joanne: Good luck Lis. Ask him to rub a bit more stuff on it so you don’t feel as much pain

Mark: I don’t know if there’s any left

Lisa: I REALLY CAN’T DO THIS NO ONE SAID IT WOULD LOOK LIKE THIS, YOU LOT LIED!

Mark: O come on! When it’s over with you won’t be the same, you’ll be a women

Lisa: Maybe I’m not ready yet I’m only 15, I think I need a bit more time!

Mark: It’s going to hurt just as much when you’re older. It’s only a few seconds of pain

Lisa: Alright then just hurry up. And even if I say stop, don’t; just keep on pushing. I’ll be alright.

30 minutes later

Lisa: That really weren’t as bad as I thought it would be.

Joanne: Really? What happened exactly?

Lisa: O shut up Joanne, don’t make me explain the gory details!

Joanne: Ha Ha Ha, Go on

Lisa: Well he took it out the packet put it on then just shoved it in my mouth! I felt a little prick but it was only two seconds of pain! I could swear needles are supposed to hurt that’s why they are all pointy and stuff. Then after I was numb he just took out my molars and now I’m a woman. That’s what happened.

A simple shopping trip

Naseemah: Why not?
Dad: Because I said so.
Naseemah: Oh, and that sorts it does it?
Dad: Yes it does and do not use that tone of voice with me.
Naseemah: But all my friends are allowed to go. It’s only Walthamstow.
Dad: I don’t care what you friends get up to, no daughter of mine is going to be hanging around shops.
Naseemah: Why not?
Dad: Because I said so.
Naseemah: No! I want a reason.
Dad: I gave you a reason; I do not want you to go out.
Naseemah: It’s Mum isn’t it?
Dad: No!
Naseemah: Yes it is! Ever since mum has died you have done nothing but made me feel suffocated.
Dad: That’s not true.
Naseemah: Yes it is and you know it. It’s okay for you. You’ve lived your life. It’s me who is stuck at home with nothing to do while my friends are out enjoying themselves.
Dad: There are plenty of things to do in the house.
Naseemah: Like what exactly, cooking and cleaning?
Dad: No, you’ve got a computer in your room-
Naseemah: I don’t want a bloody computer!
Dad: NASEEMAH!
Naseemah: All I want is to be able to live my life and have fun and I’m not allowed that. I don’t want material possessions.
Dad: I don’t know what to say.
Naseemah: How about ‘Yes Naseemah you can go to Walthamstow with your friends’
Dad: How about ‘no you can't.’
Naseemah: It’s so unfair!
Dad: Life is unfair.
Naseemah: But Hasan can go out whenever he likes.
Dad: He’s a boy.
Naseemah: That’s sexist.
Dad: Oh that’s what you call it these days.
Naseemah: Meaning?
Dad: All I want to do is to protect my fourteen year old daughter and then I am branded as being sexist. Well if I don’t want my daughter to go out but I let my son who is 6 years older than her to go out then I am a sexist.
Naseemah: That's not the point!
Dad: Then what is?
Naseemah: The point is Dad, you can’t keep me confined in the house all my life. Sooner or later you’re going to have to get over mum being murdered and give me my freedom.

My Love

Bob: Honey... [Coughs Roughly]
Jess: Yes, darling... I’m listening
Bob: [Coughs]
Jess: Go on...
Bob: ... I ... I’m going to die right??
Jess: Don’t talk...
Bob: Yes, I know it... I’m not wrong
Jess: Don’t worry honey... don’t get yourself tired...
Bob: But...
Jess: Shhhhh
Bob: I know I’m going to die... but before I do... [Coughs] I have to confess something/s to you...
Jess: shh... you don’t have to confess anything.
Bob: Yes! I want you to know about it...
Jess: Take it easy darling...
Bob: Listen... I made love to your sister... and also to Marianne, your best friend...
Jess: Stop... [Sniffs]
Bob: ... and to Miriam, my secretary... and ... and to Rose, John’s wife... and... You should know this... since we got married, i always cheated on you. [Cries]
Jess: I know it Honey... I know...
Bob: But...
Jess: Now relax sweetie ... and let the poison take full effect...

Sharp Rose/Angels with dirty faces.

Amy: She knows what she's doing. Look at her.
Rose: Suppose she does.
Amy: What a whore.
Rose: Hmm... whore.
Amy: She's clever though, doing it so slyly.
Rose: Hmm.
Amy: Why are you acting so... weird?
Rose: (pauses) Well... she's not the only sly one here.
Amy: Yeah, true. I mean who does Jessica think she is? The fucking slag.
Rose: NO Amy I didn't mean Jessica.
Amy: Oh what? Janet. Interesting. I thought we agreed she's alright. But yeah, I get the angle you're coming from...
Rose: No Amy.
Amy: Then what.
Rose: (pauses)
Amy: Say it Rose. Just say it 'cos I don't want to waste my break with you taking your time. If you've got something to say, come say it to my face.
Rose: I'M ON ABOUT YOU. YES YOU AMY.
Amy: (Amy looks shocked) So... what are you trying to say?
Rose: AMY YOU'RE SO DUMB. I'm fed up of this, every break lunch and any other time we spend with eachother you just talk about other people. Everyone knows you do, why can you talk about everyone behind their back and yet you can't tell them face to face?
Amy: Atleast I don't stand there with stupid socks, and stupid shoes looking like such a geek... God Rose your nothing without me.
Rose: Ok we'll see... I'm gone yeah, fuck you. (Rose walks off towards Jessica leaving Amy in the playground by herself.)





**********************************************************


Angels with dirty faces.

Jane: Yes miss. I'll see you later, and miss, thanks for everything you've done. It's really helped. (Jane walks out to meet up with her friends)
Lucy: Miss, I just love that dress your wearing, (Miss turns round the corner out of earshot) shame really, she's so fat, I'm surprised the old cow can fit into it! (All the girls giggle)
Sarah: Anyway girls, oh my days did I tell you about Ashley? You know how I went to his house yesterday? Well... (she whispers, all the girls giggle)
Christina: Are you serious Sarah?
Sarah nods.
Michelle: You go sister! So what are you going to that party tonight with him?
Sarah nods again smiling.
Lucy: That's nothing. Me and Jamie (she whispers, everyone giggles)
Christina: Bloody hell Luce... You're mad. If your dad ever found out, he would kill you and Jamie! Anyway, girls are you going to Bobsters party tonight?
All the girls apart from Jane shout: YES!!!
Michelle: What about you Jane?
Jane: Nah I can't, besides I don't want to.
Sarah: Why?
Christina: Yeah how comes you don't? Not in a rude way but you never come out.
Lucy: Yeah. And we've all done it, why don't you?
Jane: Lucy what do you know? What do all of you know?
Sarah: Are you on your period or something?
Michelle: Shut up sarah, what is it Jane?
Sarah: Have you even started your period?
Michelle: shhhh
Sarah: What? We don't even know if she has.
Jane: I don't want to talk about it. Leave me alone.
Sarah: Jane you soppy cow can you just say what it is?
Jane: Alright. But you lot can't say anything to anyone yeah? (all the girls nod their head) I'm pregnant! (everyone looks shocked. Eventually sarah speaks)
Sarah: So she has started her period then.

Task 22 again

(This is set in a care home, with a social worker:Sharon, and a very difficult child: Orange.)

Sharon: Hey Orange, want do you want to do today?
Orange: No, I’ve got better things to do than hang out with you.
Sharon: Hey don’t say that to me, what are you doing anyway?
Orange: stealing Peter’s flute.
Sharon: Orange, you shouldn’t do that, what are you writing?
Orange: A plan to wet you.
Sharon: Really, how interesting, tell me about it.
Orange: Ok, umm, well when you go out to your car to go home, I come out with a hose and soak you to pieces, hahahahaha!
Sharon: That’s not nice Orange, why do you want to wet me?
Orange: I don’t like you.
Sharon: Why? I like you, you’re my friend.
Orange: How stupid can you get? Sharon you’re a geek hahaha!
Sharon: Orange, That’s horrible, apologise
Orange: You joking you little silly cow.
Sharon: Don’t be so rude, apologise now.
Orange: No
Sharon: Yes
Orange: (Angrier) NO
Sharon: (Firmly) YES!
Orange: (Yells) NOOOOO!
Sharon: Yes Orange Now!
(Orange starts to cry and attack Sharon.)
Sharon: Orange, Stop it now, get off me, NOW, Orange, Stop IT! (Slaps Orange)
Orange: You little B****
Sharon: Apologise, Orange, listen to me now.
Orange: Bloody hell, it’s just a word, Sharon, oh my giddy gosh! Don’t wet yourself
Sharon: Excuse me! What did you just say to me?
Orange: I said; Bloody hell, it’s just a word, Sharon, oh my giddy gosh! Don’t wet yourself!
Sharon: Orange, don’t say that to me, I’m your social worker.
Orange: And a crap one to!
Sharon: Orange, please can you stop this, Where are you going?
Orange: Getting a hose.
Sharon: Wait
(Sharon Follows Orange outside.)
Orange: Turn round Sharon; I’m going to give you a present.
Sharon: Only if you apologise to me.
Orange: Okey dokey
Sharon: What’s the word?
Orange: What the ‘S’ word?
Sharon: Yes.
Orange: Ok, S***
Sharon: Not that word Orange!
Orange: What the hell do you mean?
Sharon: Sorry! That word! Ok!
Orange: Oh, Thank you Sharon, I knew you would come around.
Sharon: Orange, NO you say that to me.
Orange: Ok, just turn around.
Sharon: Fine.
(Turns around and folds her arms. Sighs)
Orange: Ok, Look!
(Wets Sharon with a hose.)
Sharon: Orange, Come back here, NOW!!!!!
(Orange, runs away and Sharon chases her.)

Task 22- Aero bubbles

Katie: You know aero chocolate bar?
Eve: Yeah...
Katie: Have you felt the bubbles melt?
Eve: Katie is you nuts or something?
Katie: I don’t think they have nuts in there do they?
Eve: How long will this take to get through your thick skull man?
Katie: Well (offended) I just asked you if felt the bubbles melt and you got all huffy on me!
Eve: Ok, ok yes I can feel the bubbles bloody melt in an aero bar, ok you happy.
Katie: NO! (Crying) I can’t!
Eve: What? Katie man no point crying about it you must be joking!
Katie: It’s not fair. (Hits eve hard.)
Eve: What the hell Katie, its bloody chocolate bar! Ok it doesn’t matter about the bubbles
Katie: Then, why? Eve did they write it on the packet, Look, look it clearly says: Can You feel the bubbles melt? And I can’t? WHY?
Eve: So you think I know the obvious answer then?
Katie: Clearly! (Shouting)
Eve: (quietly and calmly) Katie can I ask you something?
Katie: What? (Rudely)
Eve: (yelling) what is it with you and aero bubbles?
Katie: (sobbing) They Lied to me Eve, has anyone ever done that to you before? Eve hurt you from the inside?
Eve: (sarcastically) No of course not, I know, I feel your pain...
Katie: Thank god, eve you know how I feel!
Eve: Shut up you doughnut!
Katie: See even your lying to me!
Eve: Look Katie takes another one and see if you can feel the bubbles melt...
Katie: Eve.
Eve: yes
Katie: You know aero chocolate bars?
Eve: (coldly) yes.
Katie: Can you feel the bubbles melt?

Task 22: One Million Tiny Plays about Britain

Now for some dramatic DIALOGUE. Or, in other words, a play script - involving TWO people this time.

And I would like to use as our model here a column in the Saturday edition of the national Guardian newspaper, entitled 'One Million Tiny Plays about Britain'. They are written by Craig Taylor, and each one demonstrates the following wonderful features:

• It is concise, brief and simple, and yet still powerful, profound and multi-layered.
• It does not appear to be lacking anything, despite its brevity, and exists and works on its own.
  
• It reveals fascinating facets of both characters, often allowing us to read loads between the lines.
• It is built around conflict, the essence of effective drama, and explores that conflict in an original way.
• It presents us with a convincing, authentic and engaging human relationship.
• Whether comic, disturbing or tragic, it creates exactly what it claims to be: A TINY PLAY.

Here are some examples from the past few years. Read them carefully: which one(s) do you like the most? Which work best as a piece of drama? What is it about the best one(s) which works so well?

Exemplar 1:

Two women are working in the cloakroom of a theatre in Nottingham

Joyce They don't even taste like mints.
Jean Wait till you get to the middle.
Joyce Is it soft at the middle then?
Jean Delicious, really.
Joyce And minty?
Jean More minty than last night's.
Joyce Which coat did they come from?
Jean That red one.
Joyce Ooh, lovely pattern on it.
Jean You should try it on.
Joyce I might after the interval.
Jean It's good someone's still wearing coats like that. [Pause] Shall we have another mint?
Joyce It passes the time, doesn't it?
Jean You know, I swear I won't go into some of these newer coats.
Joyce You don't know what you'll find.
Jean The pockets are full of rubbish.
Joyce And Skittles.
Jean I would never eat a Skittle.
Joyce You can tell a lot from someone's pockets.
Jean I once took Diana Riggs' coat - in her pocket was a packet of Polos.
Joyce That's an elegant mint.
Jean I ate three.
Joyce For an elegant woman.
Jean I don't think she even noticed.
Joyce That's the most famous coat we've had here.
Jean Except for the Lloyd Webber.
Joyce There was never a Lloyd Webber.
Jean You were off that night.
Joyce And you never mentioned it?
Jean You never asked.
Joyce That would've passed the time.
Jean I was almost scared to go in his pockets. It sat there all first half. I finally put my hand in. The pockets were deep and lined with strange fur. I could sense something at the bottom.
Joyce Out with it.
Jean It was a half-eaten HobNob.
Joyce Surely he'd finish it at least.
Jean I think he's gone downhill. I couldn't even watch Cats after that.
Joyce I won't believe it.
Jean And him being a life peer and everything. He could have finished it. [Pause] Fancy another mint?

Exemplar 2:

A mother sits by her son's bedside in a Manchester hospital

Lydia This card from your auntie says, 'Turn that frown upside down.' Would you like to look at it?
Alex No.
Lydia I'll set it on your bedside table.
Alex No.
Lydia There's a little sun on the inside saying, 'Think sunny thoughts.'
Alex Take it off the table, Mother.
Lydia It's nice. I'll put it on the bed by your hand. How is your hand?
Alex It's my wrist. It's not my hand.
Lydia Of course. [Pause] Some flowers in here would make it less dark. We want to remind you it's not winter for ever. Everyone's been very supportive.
Alex Then you've told everyone...
Lydia Just that you were a bit low.
Alex And did you tell him?
Lydia I thought it best to keep it in the family.
Alex He's my partner.
Lydia Stephen is not family.
Alex He's my family.
Lydia He's not with you any more.
Alex I don't care - the note was to him.
Lydia But you didn't mean what you wrote. [Pause] Now this card is from your sister. It says, 'Chin Up.' See, the man on it has a big chin.
Alex Did you even phone Stephen? Does he know where I am?
Lydia Would you like me to put your sister's card on the bedside table?
Alex No.
Lydia I guess we all get winter blues.
Alex Take it off the table, Mother.
Lydia According to Father Paul, what you're feeling is called SAD.
Alex Then you told Father Paul, did you? Just the family then?
Lydia He says light therapy works.
Alex I don't want light therapy.
Lydia We'll get you a good lightbulb.
Alex I'd like Stephen here.
Lydia Such a dark time of year. Sometimes I wonder why we live here.
Alex I know. [Pause]
Lydia Right. And this nice card here is from your gran.

Exemplar 3:

A woman presses a glass to a wall in a hotel room in Ipswich. Her husband sits nearby.

Em Actually they're not finished at all. They've started again, they have.
Harry Shall I turn the telly down?
Em Mute it, Harold. Mute the thing.
Harry Does it sound like she's on top?
Em Does being on top sound different?
Harry Less muffled, maybe. All sorts of people do it like that these days.
Em They're really going now. I haven't heard that word in a while.
Harry What word?
Em I'm not repeating it here.
Harry They say some words sound better in hotel rooms.
Em Not in decent conversation. I think she must be eastern European, the lady on top.
Harry Then she is on top, is she? Apparently, that's quite enjoyable.
Em She sounds like Fran's cleaner.
Harry Maybe she's a Polish lady.
Em Well, she did just say a few things I didn't understand.
Harry Plenty of them around these days. Did I watch that documentary on them with you?
Em Who else do you watch telly with?
Harry This programme on eastern Europeans picking all our asparagus.
Em I didn't see that. That was the night I was sick with the tummy bug.
Harry Right, and nothing was coming up, was it?
Em Mostly just bile. [Pause] Do you think they're on the same romantic getaway as us?
Harry Well, it was an excellent deal.
Em Do you think they paid as much as we did?
Harry They couldn't have got a better price. I had that voucher.
Em But we had to spend some on this lingerie, which is actually quite itchy.
Harry And it wasn't cheap, was it?
Em I can feel a bit of a rash coming.
Harry Should we crack on with the romance regardless? Maybe you on top?
Em I'm going to finish listening. My, these eastern Europeans work hard.

Exemplar 4:

Two builders in a van near Chepstow look at a Page 3 girl

Harry That one? She's fit, she is.
Tim But do you see anything more?
Harry Nice set on her. Natural and all, if you like natural. Which I do.
Tim I'm not looking at those.
Harry I am.
Tim But look at her face.
Harry Since when am I supposed to look at the face?
Tim That isn't funny, yeah?
Harry All right, I'll look at her face. There. Decent face.
Tim It's all jokes to you, isn't it? All day it's having a laugh. Putting salt in my tea.
Harry I'm sorry, yeah?
Tim Calling me a bender if I drop something.
Harry I'm looking at her face now. OK? She's got a nose, a couple of eyes. I wouldn't kick her out of bed.
Tim Look closer.
Harry I'm not getting too close. Not to some girl from Bexley.
Tim Will you look into her eyes?
Harry What's the matter with you?
Tim Just don't make a joke and look into her eyes.
Harry We've got 15 minutes left to eat. They're blue, those eyes. OK?
Tim What do you think they say about her?
Harry Do I care? There'll be another girl tomorrow. With eyes as well.
Tim I think she looks vulnerable. There's something in her eyes.
Harry They treat them fine. They probably let her cover up right after the photo.
Tim I want to clothe her.
Harry Bit late now, mate.
Tim And give her dignity.
Harry Give her what? (Pause)
Tim Put this paper over her.
Harry Don't you tear up the football pages. I've not read those yet.
Tim I'm going to cover her.
Harry Then put your own Snickers over her, then. You happy now?
Tim I think she is.

Exemplar 5:

A mother and her young son walk near a school in Nuneaton

Mum And then?[Pause] And then what do you do, Stevie?
Stevie Call you on the mobile.
Mum If anyone talks to you - if a stranger tries to stop you on the way home - you don't text, you call.
Stevie Can I go outside once I'm home?
Mum Who with? And what for?
Stevie For football... I don't know.
Mum You've got football on the PlayStation, haven't you?
Stevie What if I want to go to the shop?
Mum Do you remember the little girl who went to the shop?
Stevie Which one?
Mum The one who didn't come back?
Stevie I don't remember her.
Mum You call me if you want something from the shop. I'm doing this for you and you're on a good plan and you like the phone, don't you?
Stevie Mum? What is a stranger?
Mum Stevie, you know that. Anyone who shouldn't be speaking to you. No one should be speaking to you on that walk home.
Stevie Then is Dad one?
Mum No. He's your father. [Pause] But there are only certain days he should be talking to you after school.
Stevie His days. Dad days.
Mum And there are other days when your mum, who loves you, is able to pick you up.
Stevie Dad sometimes comes on the other days.
Mum Really. Does he?
Stevie Before you. Only to say hi.
Mum I didn't know that. You have to use your phone to tell me.
Stevie It's Dad.
Mum Yes, but your father has rules, too.
Stevie Is he a stranger when he comes and it isn't his day?
Mum No, not exactly. He's your father. He says he loves you and you have every right to believe him. You don't have to call me if he comes. [Pause] Just text.

Exemplar 6:

An elderly woman stops a man at the gate to her house in Sheffield. He's holding an armful of flyers

Agnes Excuse me? Did you put this circular through the letter box?
Atif I'm sorry, yes.
Agnes I'm glad I caught you. Tell me, does your restaurant deliver? [Pause]
Atif Yes.
Agnes Does it deliver?
Atif Yes.
Agnes Does it make home deliveries?
Atif Yes.
Agnes To here? Do you understand what I'm saying? To here?
Atif Oh, no.
Agnes So I'd have to go to the restaurant? And do you recommend the food?
Atif Yes.
Agnes Where are you from? You're not from this country.
Atif Yes.
Agnes What is your country?
Atif Pakistan.
Agnes My daughter toured that part of the world years ago. Before all the... There have been troubles lately, haven't there? She lives in Spain now.
Atif Yes. [Pause]
Agnes And your family? Are they back there? It's easy to keep in touch. You'd think. Even if you're only as far away as Spain. You'd think people could just pick up the phone.
Atif Yes, but...
Agnes I'm sorry?
Atif But if you want delivery, you call the number here.
Agnes If I want?
Atif Delivery. [Pause]
Agnes So you do deliver?
Atif Oh yes, yes. [He laughs]
Agnes Oh, will you be coming back here?
Atif Yes. And takeaway.
Agnes No, but do you... You will be coming back to my street sometime? Because feel free to knock. I'm usually here. Alone. It's been so nice to talk to you. [Pause]
Atif Yes. Delivery.

Unsurprisingly, your task this week is to produce your own Tiny Play about Britain. Two characters. Brief, deceptively simple script. Genuine, engaging relationship. Original, captivating content. A mini play, all on its own...

Deadline = Midnight on Saturday 22nd March

I will try to post my own attempt in the next couple of days.

Good luck!

That's life

(An elderly woman sits on a rocking chair by a window, slowly rocking back and forth)
(Spot light on the woman in the rocking chair)
(She notices the audience, stops rocking and looks startled)
Oh! Hello.. I didn't see you there in the shadows, you gave me a fright. (She half smiles) I was miles away..
(She goes back to rocking on her chair, there's a silence)

It's not that I've had a bad life, I have done what every human being was put on this earth to do, I tried to lead as full a life as possible... Oh what fun we used to have when we were young (She chuckles) When we were young... (Short pause) Most of the years gone by seem like distant memories to me now. But still, I have served my purpose I think, to the best of my ability and have had a good life. As for regrets? Well, we all have a few... Would we be fully human if we didn't? (She smiles faintly) To be quite truthful, I have a few regrets too many... Perhaps if I was at the right place, at the right time, maybe if I had been nicer to my mother, not had such awful arguments with my friends, perhaps if I hadn't of let him go...
(There's a long silence and the woman starts to rock back and forth again)

My father, he always told me a life without passion, without love is a life half lived and I can sit here all night and tell you my stories, my fading memories, but I can't tell you of a life spent with someone I truly loved, no... A part of me has always felt somewhat, (She struggles to find the wordsempty, somewhat.. lonely. All alone in a room full of people..
I remember my mother, how beautiful she looked in that yellow summer's dress (She smiles to herself) I remember my father, how he looked at her with such adoring eyes.. You could see him looking at his whole world. He loved her, truly loved her...
(She puts on a deep voice, imitating a man's) "A life lived without love, is a life half lived" , he'd keep telling me.. Oh but I did love... A long, long time ago (she looks out the window) I must have just hit 16, and I remember the day I saw him as clear in my mind as if it was yesterday. I got lost you see, walking up the hilltops in the country side and at first, I was quite taken-aback when a boy- not much older than me it seemed- was running towards me! (She smiles at the memory) I have never seen such a sight, I wondered what all the fuss was about, and when he finally caught up to me, the first thing he said when he cought his breath was "Im sorry miss, but it's just that I've never seen a pair of blue eyes that shine as bright as yours" (She gives a short laugh) He told me he's William, at my service. He had my heart right there and then, I was hooked. We spent the day together, and the whole summer after that. It seemed there was no one else who understood me better... And the deep green of his eyes, ah, it was almost deep enough to drown in. I fell in love instantly, as many young hearts tend to do... But of course, the summer ended and we had to say our goodbyes.. The world doesn't wait for anyone, you see...
I have never told anyone about William, not even my husband, I did love my late husband of course, but it was more of a brotherly love, not a love filled with passion and desire, it was more of ( A pause) a deep friendship, and that was fine, I only married him because it seemed to be what my parents wanted, the finest gentleman around, what a great catch... Indeed he was, and we shared many happy times together but you see, William... (She smiles to herself) William was my first love. After all these years, I have never found a love so deep, so true... I have known passion, I have known such a love that could have been mistaken for obsession even, total adoration for another human being... (A long pause) A love, that lasted for one summer, and that summer lasted a lifetime in my heart. There's a silence
(The old woman falls silently still and glances down at her aging hands)
I have often thought of getting in contact with him, but weeks flew by, and then a month and before I knew it, 50 years have gone by and I haven't managed to pick up a pen and paper!
(She looks towards the audience)
No, I haven't had a bad life, I have done things that most people only dream of doing, but yet I wonder, was my life half-lived? Is a summer romance enough to fill a lonely heart still longing for true love..? (short pause)
Perhaps next life time, I will do things differently...
(She goes back to rocking slowly back and forth, while glancing out the window)

(The room fades to black)

Lifes Twist [Redraft] Task 21

(A teenage boy lays in bed playing with his hair, staring at the blank ceiling in a room on the 6Th floor of a building. The lights out and the only light now is coming from the window.)

Hmm. I wonder if things could have turned out differently, if only I done something different earlier on. Dad wasn't as bad as mum makes him out to be now. I hate the way she talks about him sometimes, yes he was wrong but at least his intentions were good, he just wanted the best for everyone in his own way, whether he was wrong or right, too stubborn. Maybe I would have been better of staying with him, instead of running off with mum? Or maybe... maybe I shouldn't even be with any of them at all.

(A tear drops from his eye. He then gets up, paces around the room for a while and then slowly walks over to the window and rests forehead on the cold glass.)

Everything that happened went wrong all because of me. Because of me they split and now they're so far apart. Because of me everything changed. Nothing seems right no more, because of me. It seems the world would be a miles better place without me after all. But then again, I never really volunteered to be born. I Never asked to be in a family did I. I never asked to be given a body, or to have a life. Besides everything would be better off without me anyway, so what's the point. I might as well not bother with anything anymore. It's all useless.

(Slides balcony door open slowly and walks over to the edge, wind blowing steadily making his overgrown hair move about wildly.)

Hmm... I miss dad. I wonder where he's at now, what he's doing, if he remembers me even. I doubt he does. I wonder if I'll ever see him again. I hope he's OK and all that. I hope he's happy though. If only mum and dad just got along like the rest of the world, life would be so much easier for everyone. What ever I do goes wrong now. Everything I do is either useless, a failure or ends up completely negatively. Hmm, I'm obviously not needed here, nobody's gonna miss me when I'm gone then for sure. No ones gonna give a shit.

(Leans over balcony edge and falls to his death)

Love Vs Death Redraft

(She sits down on her bed, reminiscing fond memories, wondering if things will ever be the same. She gets up and looks out her window looking on at the romantic young couples arm in arm wondering if she would ever find herself in that position again.)

Life’s not easy you know. Being me. The amount I went through… GOING to go through… Still AM going through. It’s unreal. I hate how I had the one for me… I knew he was. And then it just ended. Because of him. The one I loved. Love still. (Looks at the floor) I love how he treated me… the way he talked to me, the way he said he loved me. I just don’t understand why it had to end. (Tears in eye). He said we were drifting apart... Yeah right. Maybe the fact that I wasn't as pretty as all the other girls or as popular... or the fat that my parents were the most strict and over protective people you could ever meet; not allowing me to go anywhere out late. As if that’s the only thing im crying about though. Me being a hormonal imbalanced typical teenage girl tutting, sighing and with uncontrollable moodswings; regularly. I hate how my parents and family don’t understand why I am the way I am. I can’t help but to be growing can I? Can you hear that? Mum screaming at me to run in the shower. Dad screaming even more saying how I'm wasting his electricity by leaving the boiler on. Is money all they bloody care bout? (Heavily crying)

I don’t mean to cry. That’s just the way I am I guess. It’s as if my body wasn’t built to control tears. Maybe that’s one thing God should’ve included in the human package; immunity to pain. Why does being so young and naive have to hurt? I mean, I just can’t help but to fall in love. I want him back. My parents aren’t making things any easier for me either by nagging me. They won’t ever understand. Or is it just that they enjoy inflicting all this pain on me? They like to see me suffer? They use GCSE exams and revision to suffocate me in fact… as in a form of punishment? Does HE want to see me suffer too? Does he know I still love him and that he loves someone else now? That bitch. Claire. Her name. I mean so what if she's the prettiest thing in school... green eyes... long glamorous hair... a smile that makes your heart melt. He felt that way about me too once. DIDN'T HE?(Hyperventilates). But that's it... I'm gonna take a stand... Againt my family... my teachers... her.

(She takes out a picture of him and his current girlfriend; Claire, that she had stolen from his backpack earlier on today. The rips the photograph into two separating him and Claire. She sticks a picture of herself onto the other end with him whilst smearing Claire's picture with her own blood.)

It's true what they say I guess. Love hurts

Monologue Redraft

(a 15 yr old boy, walks down a scruffy road with a school bag slung around his shoulder, he looks into camera as he speaks)

I don't know what I would do without the shuffle on my ipod. Everywhere I go each song seems to narrate what's going on, or what I'm feeling. The perfect example of this is the other day when I was in Liverpool St station and suddenly Hunting for Witches by Bloc Party comes on and then the whole of the station starts zooming around and I feel like I am the only one who isn't zooming around. It's kind of like a score for a film, and you imagine yourself as the protagonist telling a story, soaking up the atmosphere, and as the music reaches its climax and so does the scene, then the next track comes on. So, I guess that it’s not the music that narrates it’s the music that changes the way you narrate your own life.

(He turns a corner still looking into camera intensely)

Sometimes if no one's looking I start lip-syncing the song, like in a music video; like Richard Ashcroft in the video for Bitter Sweet Symphony; that’s the kind of song that can really make you feel like the main character, sweeping melodies with intense droney vocals. If I am in a really good mood I might even dance a little, like the other week I was walking home and as I passed St. Marks, and the swing version of Smells Like Teen Spirit comes on I start dancing like the Jets and the Sharks in West Side Story, when they are circling around each other bending over and doing those over the top clicks and turns.

(He turns another corner)

My family have always communicated through music -or puddings- you can tell when my dad is in a good mood because he flicks on Elvis -Elvis Costello not Elvis Presley-he refers to Elvis Costello as Elvis to signify who he really thinks is the king. I have a theory my dad was like me, Elvis started becoming popular around the time my dad was my age, I think that my dad liked his teenage years and that’s why he plays Elvis when he's sad.

(He walks through his school gates)

My mum on the other hand was more of a pudding woman.

(He sits on a bench in the playground)

That's why whenever she was happy or pleased with me she brought home a sticky toffee pudding and ice cream.

(The bell goes and he gets up and starts to walk up the stairs)

Ever since mum pissed off I guess my dad has soaked up her pudding duties.

(He enters his classroom)

He hasn't mentioned anything about mum since she went to visit her sister

(He sits down)

The only reason I know that he's sad is because, in the evenings, he sits in front of the computer eating ice cream and listening to Emerson, Lake and Palmer.

Shanade Clarence- Ugly? REDRAFT.

(Young girl flicking through a teenage magazine on her bed)

Yep. The problem page. This, to me, is the only place that I fit in. The 'problem' section. My whole life seems to be a problem at the moment. Infact I am the problem. The girls in the magazines live the simple life. They're beautiful, they always look good. I wish I was like that. The girls in my school are like that. Beautiful. Another place that I don't fit in. While their hair is silky and shiny, mines rusty and matted.

They've given me a few personal nicknames. 'Ginger Minger' or 'Dot to Dot' referring to my fire-freckled face. 'He' thinks I'm beautiful though. Just like the girls in the magazines; and the girls in my school.

(Edges over to the mirror, dragging her fingers through her tangled hair and rubbing at her face with her stubby fingers)
Nobody thinks of me the same way 'He' does. Whatever though yano? I know they won't even appreciate my...unusual features. (Tears coming to her eyes) I've never been accepted into a group in my life, but there's no need for them to take that concept and beat me until I forget it, and leave bruises and scars that will bring me back to reality for the rest of my life. Throwing me to the floor, (imitating violent actions) stamping on me and kicking me until they drain me emotionally and physically. Underscoring my diverse ways. (Crying and looking over to a blurry shiny metal on her bedside table) 'He' never fails me. He buys me red ribbons and ties them beautifully around my wrists, calming me, relieving my pain. My saviour, lover and carer.

(It becomes clear that it is a knife, and she edges over to it) He doesn't think I'm ugly.

betreyal

(The lights shine down on a lonely sergeant with his squad, the squad are at an opposite side of the stage to our soldier crowded around an armoured jeep. Our character starts to speak)

I don’t know where I stand nowadays I tell yer (he slings his prop m-16 over his shoulder) if it wasn’t for the bloody Americans we’d all be dead by now, dead and buried in an unmarked grave. I remember my first contact, ‘s**t’ I thought ‘looks like Mr.taliban’s come out to play again ‘cept this time he’s bought all his mates and his overnight bag with him’ ‘cept they wouldn’t need it since they had just been pumped full of lead covering every square inch of their skin turning their white hijabs crimson ‘rather it you than me’ I thought to myself with a smirk. It was part of the job description by now, kill or be killed, was my sergeants advice (glints at the sky) great man, great leader. Ill never forget the day he lost the game to a bunch of twitching junkies, remember it like it was yesterday ‘take cover’ they were his last words before his body earned the tag ‘corpse’ and was lashed viscously against the wall.

(Getting riled up, he intensifies)

People just don’t understand you know? The pain’s not only getting shot at by some extremist without a cause, or waking up in the morning and finding yourself in a hospital bed without an inkling on why your there. No. (Walks closer to the audience staring down every eye in the building) The real pain, the pain that doesn’t fade, the pain that iodine wont heal, is the sleeping with one eye open or staring down the barrel of a sniper to pick off some 7 year old ‘bomb mule’ and watching his head pop like a watermelon (gaining momentum he carries on) that’s where the real pain lies! And ‘the kick in the teeth’, ‘the salt in the wound’, ‘the venom in the sting’ comes when you realise just what you’re actually fighting for, America? Na, pride? Na, political and economic power? Well I’ll leave that one up to you to decide.

(It’s getting dark. He orders his squad back to the tank and they drive back to base. The lights fade, leaving the audience guessing; suddenly the silence is interrupted by the rumble of a 50. Calibre. A fog light illuminates him and his squad)

What? O, that? Na don’t worry, just another day at the bloody office. An extremely dangerous day at the office, granted, but none the less. (Distant Taliban return fire) you know sometimes I wonder what force is better, just like the lads decide between Rambo or braveheart. The taliban in many ways have every right to kill us, I mean, it wasn’t the Uk’s war anyway. Mr. Blair’s pocket was feeling empty one day so he wanted a piece of the action. I know people who have gone against the British armed forces before to join the taliban. I can’t say I blame them. I mean they were greeted with opium, money and most of all respect. Something money can't buy. They were real men; they were more Rambo than braveheart.

(With the speech over and the gunfire suppressed the light fades, and footsteps and chatter are heard, its about midnight and his squad are off to bed. Our character sits on the edge of his bed)

I don’t need this, this constant struggle with life. Coming home to greet a steel locker and a foam mattress. I bet the taliban don’t have this problem, many say Islam Is an alternative reality, a ‘see things from the other side’ sort of reality. Right now I’m waiting, waiting for a signal to become ever joyful and indulge in Islam. We all end up dead, its just a question of how and why. I always knew I was more of a Rambo guy, I was never braveheart. Allahu Akbar.

(With that he reaches for his belt and looks skywards. The lights fade and the set changes to a destructed version of the old. There’s an almighty bang and the lights blare, the audience are greeted with total carnage and the knowledge of what has just happened.)

Pondering (post 2)

A young man aged between 20 and 30 sits in an old oak rocking chair, around him is the stench of rotting flesh and he sits there past midnight)

WHAT HAVE I DONE?!!!!!!!!
Did this young defenceless man deserve to feel my rage and wrath? What did he do to me? Could I have stopped this from happening?
NO, NO
There was nothing more I could have done to stop myself, ah yes I remember exactly what this impotent fool done to me, he raided my wife’s riches and made her last living moments worse than the devil torturing her for the rest of her life.
BUT WAIT, COULD I NOT HAVE LEFT THIS MAN FOR THE AUTHOROTIES TO PUNISH?
NO, WAIT
I had originally gone to the police and the police reports had implied that there was not enough evidence to prove him guilty, that’s what struck a nerve and that’s what enraged me, so in reality there are multiple blames for his death not just me, NO!!! I REFUSE TO HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS HATRED AND TORMENT, WHY OH WHY DID THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN TO SOMEONE CLOSE TO ME!!!!!!!!! ,First if he hadn’t done anything to my wife and let her be then I may not have gone on the violent streak after him, yes, and if the police had just done the damn right thing and put that man in prison for the rest of his life or even just given him the death sentence then I wouldn’t have need to intervene and take matters into my own hands, THE STUPID BUFFOONERY OF THOSE POLICE, HOW WOULD THEY FEEL IF SOMEONE CLOSE TO THEM HAD TO SUFFER THIS HORRIFIC WAY, I WOULD VERY MUCH ENJOY SEEING THEY’RE FACES WHEN SOMETHING HAPPENS TO THEM, yes…THOSE SHOCKED FACES AND CRYING OF THE HEART, ONLY THEN WOULD THEY TRULY KNOW HOW IT FEELS! , yes…. It wasn’t my fault It would have absolutely nothing to do with and my wife would still be here if he hadn’t picked on the wrong couple yes, everything would be normal, my wife and I would be enjoying nice strolls across the river bed and great nights together.
I distinctly remember how civilised and human I was before…..before….. this “incident”... If you saw me on the street I would’ve been the one and only person to light up your day, I would’ve lit up the room and made every second of everyday that you spent with me seem like heaven had descended upon us, and I would’ve made the grumpiest man or woman into a “Mary Poppins” of person.
THOUGH THAT MAY BE TRUE I COULD HAVE RESISTED, I SHOULD HAVE RESISTED.
I don’t know what on earth I should do, I don’t know who feels more dead, HIM or ME.
WHAT SHOULD I DO??

Mental - Redraft

(A young lady sits in her room)

(Sighs, looks down before beginning to talk) 5am that’s when ‘e goes to sleep... after the overdose of sleepin’ pills that is... 6am, guess what that is... that’s when ‘e wakes up (Laughs softly)। I never understood why they brought him ‘ere। (Roughly wipes an eye, voice rises) ‘E has no reason to be ‘ere। This damned place made him go nuts (Looks down in anger, Pause, sighs).

(Pushes against ears in anger) Arghhhh... (Gets up and shuts the door)

(Sits back down)I can’t bare the sound of his screams। I’ve been working ‘ere for the past 10 years; but I’ve never before felt the pain of another... never! I couldn’t...I mean... it was part of my job... to ‘ave no feelin’. (Puts head in hands)

I tried to get him out of ‘ere before it was much too late... I nearly lost my job but if that bothered me then I really ain’t human at all! I secretly let him listen to music from a Vinyl Player once in a while... but they caught me out of course।(Gets up, re-opens the door and sits back down)

(Looks at the door and slowly turns back) Another electric shock or dip in the water I guess... that’s all they ever do in this shithole... ‘Elp people? My foot! They never liked him... Who knows why... maybe it’s ‘cause he was always normal and they couldn’t face the fact that they turned him into a total nutcase!

My last attempt at helpin’ him was useless... (Shouts in anger) you know they tried to f***ing electrocute me! That’s how you know they’re the totally insane... (Calms down and wipes a tear) But I tried to ‘elp him... I honestly did; it’s just... they got to him before me। (Cries) You can guess what they did to him... I remember the day too well. Grey outside and grey in. I wasn’t allowed inside; they were afraid... they were afraid I would stop ‘em... (pauses, wipes a tear) stop ‘em from doin’ what they did.

I couldn’t... I was useless! (Cries & walks away)