Atul:
Lost consistently
Forever torment alive
Crying out for love
Eeshwar:
Great velocity
My strength a fine beast within
Troubled to let go
Lopa:
Blissful for Atul
Nothing left for this marriage
Terminate yourself
Jai:
Craving this one jewel
A sweet tune for hereafter
Fly away with me
Vina:
Ring on a finger
Without you my other half
Pointless for today
Laxman:
My one candle light
So far but ever closer
Avert me from hate
Lata:
Giving me nothing
Mother’s love wrongly hidden
Be rid of your shield
Posted this task late. Sorry. :)
ReplyDeleteRevamping my computer took way too long. D:
These are excellent haikus all round. Not only are your syllables spot on, but you exploit the 'theme change' to extremely powerful effect with some outstandingly striking final lines: "Terminate yourself" "Fly away with me" "Be rid of your shield" Your decision to end these three with an imperative (i.e. command) is both original and highly effective.
ReplyDeleteAnd your description of Eeshwar's strength as 'a fine beast within' is especially apt.
Excellent work, eternity.forever. Very well done.
(Not sure you can use 'avert' like that though. You 'avert' someTHING; not sure you can 'avert' somebody FROM something...)