Tourist fly away to calm Mauritius,
Where days are hot and delights are luscious.
Where tourists are stunned by views and,
Trips. Can guarantee you get tanned.
Shopping there is time left,
Not many reay for theft.
Now time to work,
For the head jerk.
Late nights,
More fights.
A powerful depiction of place (although your final rhyme seems more 'convenient' than effective). As for the iambs, however, like everyone else so far, you are not quite there.
ReplyDeleteIt is not just about number of syllables - you have, after all, got 10 syllables in both of your first two lines. It is all about where the STRESSES lie.
Don't worry though. There will be more practice next week. :)